"Whenever you are in conflict with someone, there is one factor that can make the difference between damaging your relationship and deepening it. That factor is attitude." William James

There are so many books out there on relationships. I have read my fair share of them. How-to’s for marriages, siblings, parenting, dating, co-workers, etc. Despite the wide array of books out there on the subject, we all have relationships in our lives that take up energy, time, emotions. And yet, many of these relationships don’t function the way we wish they would.

From coaching so many people and working on myself to improve certain relationships in my life, I have created this Relationship Discovery exercise. This worksheet has been extremely effective for my clients and myself to improve our mindset and actions around relationships. Even the most challenging ones. Just this week I whipped out this exercise and completed it (yet again) and it worked! It helped me create clarity and perspective with a very difficult relationship. By doing this, it made me realize that I needed to share it with you as well. I know you will get a lot out this exercise!

There are 41 questions, so it may take you 30 minutes or longer to complete. But it is so worth it! As you are answering the questions, be free with yourself to just answer whatever comes to mind. Don’t worry about it being right or wrong. If it helps you answer more honestly, make the decision that you are not going to share your answers with anyone. Don not over think it. Just write down what comes to mind. By the end of the exercise, your perspective and mindset will be transformed in one way or the other. Keep in mind, this will only work if you really allow yourself to write down your honest thoughts or feelings. So, just be free and let yourself feel, think and write whatever comes up.

You can use this form for any relationship- marriage, friendship, work, parent, cousin, anyone.

PLEASE share with me what you discover in using it! It is my hope that you improve your perspective and gain clarity with each relationship you focus on. I can’t wait to hear what you get out of this!

Happy Monday!