When I was in ninth grade I got caught shoplifting in the Modesto Mall. It was Christmas Eve and I had gone to the mall with a mission, a mission to get my family Christmas presents. I didn’t have any money, but I did have a plan. Using the twenty-five cent Macy’s bags you used to be able to purchase in the store, I made several trips into the dressing room with their gifts. I filled up the bags and walked out of the store.

Within minutes, two undercover security guards, came up from behind me, grabbed me by the arms, and threw my little, one hundred pound body onto the floor. I remember feeling the cold tiles on my face, laying there in shock, and wondering what was going to happen. I was afraid and realized that I had no idea about the potential consequences that were in front of me.

I was taken into a room inside the store. It was just the two under cover security guards and myself. They sat me down and began asking me a series of questions. I don’t remember all the questions they asked, but there was one question that I could not forget.

The question was, “Do you know what you did was wrong? ” That question had me very concerned. The question bothered me. I felt overwhelming confusion and I was stuck someplace between feeling insulted, misunderstood, and ashamed all at once.

I knew it was a rhetorical question and I knew how to answer it correctly, so I responded with a, “yes,” while half-heartedly hanging my head in shame.

The questioning went on and I answered all their questions, somewhat numb, but more disturbed about that question.

They kept talking, informing me of my potential consequences, but I wasn’t listening. I was too busy trying to figure out why that question bothered me so much.

I painfully wondered, “What is wrong with me?” You see, I didn’t think what I did was wrong, but they did. That contrast brought me embarrassment and shame. I “should” think like them.

I had very good reasons why I thought what I did was okay. I had full justification on why what I did wasn’t wrong, as I was not stealing from a person. I would never steal from a person. This reasoning was source of my feeling insulted with the onset of the question. It was clear that my thinking was flawed and as my way of thinking was being exposed through this situation, though it hurt and was very uncomfortable, a new way of thinking began to open up.

This situation was resolved and I learned a life long lesson about a very important topic, the topic of mindset.

One definition for the word, mindset is, “the established set of attitudes held by someone.” Another way to say this would be “an established way of thinking done by someone.”

Each and every one of us has a mindset running the show of our lives right now. Our mindset today is most likely much different than it was in our teens and much different than it was in our childhood, but the process of growing our mindset remains the same.

When have an established way of thinking that we want to grow and improvel, our current mindset must be exposed, uprooted, and then re-established.

Just like in this picture, the thoughts of our mindset are roots, unseen, but revealed through the the “fruits” of our tree, our life. Our actions, results, and the words that we speak are the fruits that reveal our mindset.

Some mindsets are useful and some mindsets are not. To make that distinction, we can simply ask, “How does this fruit taste?” Do our results and our behaviors taste “bitter?” Or do our results and our behaviors taste “sweet?”

A positive mindset will produce sweet results and healthy behaviors. A negative mindset will produce bitter results and and unhealthy behaviors. It’s pretty simple.

If we want sweeter results and improved habits, we must look to our mindset. We must uproot unproductive thoughts and beliefs and replace those thoughts with productive, empower, and positive thoughts and beliefs.

This process can be painful because we don’t want to be “wrong.” It can also be confusing because we often lack self awareness of our thoughts and are blind to our mindset. Because of this unconsciousness and our desire to be right, changing our thoughts creates deep resistance and can feel like getting blindsided and also cause us to feel “wrong.”

Life experiences are opportunities to expose and improve our mindsets, but that method is often the most painful. We don’t always have to have a wake up experience expose our beliefs. We can be proactive in exposing and improving our mindset through two additional methods. Through journaling and through conversation we can work on our mindset.

Journaling is an excellent way to untangle your thoughts. I make it a habit to write as often as possible. I cease to become shocked at the thoughts that come out on my paper. It’s a great habit to get into because it can help expose limiting beliefs and negativity before those thoughts become actions.



Conversing with quality people is another way to work on your thoughts. I highly recommend coaching because in a coaching conversation you have someone deeply listening and repeating back the things you are saying. I have two coaches right now and a counselor. With each and every conversation I have with my coach or counselor I find raised awareness on the type of thinking I am operating in.

I want to challenge you this week to think about your thinking. Pay attention to what type of mindset you are in and increase your awareness of your mindsets. Try some journaling. Reach out and talk with a good listener, someone who will hold up a mirror to the type of mindset you are in.

Remember to ask yourself, “Is my mindset useful, producing positivity- hope, joy, peace, innovation, and creativity, or is my mindset negative, producing thoughts of fear, doubt, worry, suspicion, and anxiety.

Remember that image of the roots and be ready to uproot any negative thinking, while watering the useful and positive ways of thinking.

Don’t be too hard on yourself when any “wrong” thinking is exposed. Everyone has flawed or ineffective thinking. We all have opportunity to grow our mindsets again and again. Be sure to have positive and encouraging people around you that support your desire to grow your mindset. Mindsets are contagious!

Have a wonderful week, conscious of your mindset. Let’s all work on creating a healthy and positive mind, so that we can improve our actions and results, making this our best year ever!

With Love and Volition,



Corry